My Mother's Love Sustained Me Throughout The Years...

A doctor told my mother that I would be ‘stillborn’. This was back in January 1944.

The photo to the right of this post is my mother, Christine Garnier, and the young child with her is...me!

My name is Carol Garnier Dutra a.k.a. MOM in Hollister.
During the summer of 1995 when I was 51 years old I went to a professional hypnotherapist, licensed by the State of California, and paid what was to me at that time a whopping fee of $200 to have my memory regressed in time in order to resolve an issue I was dealing with in my life. I did this action because I knew that there had to be something in my past life that triggered a fear I felt whenever I consulted with a medical doctor.

At the time I sought out the help of a professional hypnotherapist I had no idea of what I would learn about myself that was at the bottom of my fear. What I came away with from my hypnotherapy session was more than just an explanation of my fear of medical doctors.

I was the caregiver for my mother for the last six years of her life from September 1980 to August 1986. All of my life I felt a deep devotion to my mother so when she needed my help there was no question in my mind about helping her.

I left the therapist’s office that day in 1995, with both an explanation of my fear of medical professionals, and I also gained a deeper understanding of what was behind my unyielding devotion to my mother, and my unconditional love for her those last six years of her life.

During my hypnosis session, the therapist doing my regression didn’t find an event in my recent memory that seemed important enough to give me a panic response whenever I consulted a medical professional. The therapist made the decision to move my memory farther back in time. I know this may sound strange to some persons; in an effort to learn what was causing my fear of doctors the therapist regressed me back in time to when I was still an unborn fetus in my mother’s womb.

I remember as a child, my mother telling me, that when she was five months pregnant with me, she fell off the back porch of the rental that she, my father and my two brothers lived in. The railing gave away when my mother leaned on it as she was sweeping the porch landing. My mother fell forward, off the porch, which was 5 feet above the ground below. Her left foot was caught between two of the up and down rails that constituted part of the porch railing.

As she fell, her caught foot stopped her fall, and this action resulted in her leg being broken. When the top portion of my mother’s body hit the blacktop her right arm was broken when she put her arm in front of her face to protect her face.
I remember my mother had a tiny dark spot on her right cheek where she told me there was a small rock embedded into her cheek that was a result of her falling off the porch that day.

A passing neighbor saw my mother hanging from the porch, and called an ambulance. My mother, Christine Garnier, was taken to Lynn Hospital where she spent several weeks in the hospital, and later at home she was bedridden the remainder of her pregnancy.
My mother told me that everyone at the hospital thought that the 5-month fetus she was carrying was dead because it stopped moving after she had her accident.
That fetus was I.

Back in 1944 we didn’t have fetal monitors, which we have today where you can actually see a fetus inside of the mother’s womb. So no one had a way to see inside my mother to verify if the fetus was dead or alive. I am surprised that the doctor who attended my mother in Lynn Hospital couldn’t tell that I was still alive by listening to my heartbeat? What I am saying here is that I do believe that the doctor attending my mother lied to her, and my mother didn't believe him. I was alive; I was very alive! I must have been stunned when my mother fell that day, and I must have not moved much after her accident mainly out of a primal instinct that could be called, 'fear'. My mother told me that it was a surprise to everyone, except her, when I was born in the middle of May, alive, healthy and quite vocal!

The local newspaper, The Lynn Telegram News, published a story about my birth calling me the ‘miracle baby’ because of my mother’s terrible accident, and because I was born alive and healthy. That was the entire story my mother told me about her accident that happened to her on that gray, cold day in January 1944. All these events happened to my mother when she was only thirty eight (38) years old!

During my hypnosis session in 1995 I told the therapist, who was regressing me, that some time after my mother had her accident I could hear a male voice telling her she had both a broken leg and a broken arm, she was facing a long recovery, and it would be better for her if she terminated her pregnancy. This same person stated that I must be dead since I was not moving.

Today I realize that because my mother was 5 months pregnant, termination of her pregnancy meant that if she agreed to the termination she would have a ‘late term abortion’ where a fully formed baby is broken up into pieces inside of the mother, and all of the pieces are then sucked out of the mother.

As an adult undergoing hypnotic regression, I realized that the person who was urging my mother to terminate her pregnancy was the doctor who was assigned to her case when she was admitted to Lynn Hospital. So it follows that at some time in my adult life my subconscious mind had already made the connection between the person who tried to convince my mother to have an abortion, and medical doctors.

Since undergoing hypnotic regression, I have learned that clinical studies have been done where music has been played for unborn fetuses, resulting with the children, once they are born, showing a preference for the same type of music as was played near their mothers while the fetuses were still in their mothers’ wombs.
From these studies the conclusion has been made that an unborn fetus of at least 20 weeks term, can hear and remember the sounds of the world outside of it’s mother’s womb. A fetus of 20 weeks is a fetus of 5 months. I was a fetus of 5 months when my mother had her accident.

I was with my mother as she passed away peacefully in the summer of 1986. I was never able to ask her about what happened in Lynn Hospital after her accident back in 1944, in order to confirm from her that she was encouraged by her doctor to have a late term abortion.

Learning from my hypnotic regression in 1995 that my mother made the decision to not abort me back in January 1944 explained to me my undying love for her, and my determination to keep going physically and mentally when the whole world seemed to be crashing in on me during the six years I cared for her. During those six years I was faced with watching her health slowly deteriorate up to that day she passed away from pneumonia in August 1986 at the age of 79.

My mother’s love sustained me through out those worst years of both her life and my life, and in some ways those years when I cared for her, were the most learning years of my adult life.

Since my hypnotic regression in 1995 I became gradually less afraid of doctors, and today I no longer have a fear of medical doctors thanks to learning the truth of what caused my former fear.

It is always better to know the truth than to fear the truth!

This story is a true-life story of Carol Garnier Dutra written and published on Wednesday, May 19, 2010 in an independent blog of my creation. This true life story has also been published in my Carol Garnier Dutra's Blog.

Copyright © 2010/2011/2012 by Carol Garnier Dutra
.
Posted by MOM in Hollister, CA at 12:40 PM
.